Wednesday, January 30, 2013

The one with OKCupid.

So I signed up for OKCupid. Wow. What an interesting website! -Sarcasm!- Not that I don't find dating websites useful, but I'm not sure about OKCupid. What do you guys think, is it just a "hook up" kind of website?



Yes, it is free. Yes, there is a lot of members. Yes, with a pretty good picture, you can have lots of messages. Unfortunately, that only lasts the first week after you sign up. After that, you are old news. Yes, there is a massive amounts of creeps, but which site doesn't?! The Quick Match option would be interesting of you wouldn't have to pay to access it. No, I'm not going to try the Crazy Blind Date option. Dating someone from the internet -even if you set up the date yourself-, is already a crazy blind date. I mean, that scares me enough as it is. As a matter of fact, any date is scary.

Moving on, OkCupid is a notch over Plenty-of-Fish. Plus, I bet everyone appreciate the "Drugs -yes, -no, -never" question in the profile. Finally, we'll know straight up if we are about to date a druggie. -Nobody lies on their online dating profile, right?-

I'll tell you what happens on the OkCupid land later.

The one with all the sex.

Did I get your attention? Great. Now, I can tell you all about Yuri. I met him in a coffee a shop. While I'm at it, don't ever -ever- agree to go on a date with a stranger. Now that's its out of my system, let's get to it. Yuri was kind of funny looking. -But, hey, I'm no miss America!- Anyway, he dropped a line and I caught it. I was just really bored -There was nothing good on Hollywood Life.com and I was highly caffeinated.- He moved to my table and with started our "date". We had more coffee and then, Yuri suggested we see a movie. I thought, in theaters. He thought, at his place.
"Hum, I don't really feel [comfortable] going to your place right now.", I said.

He looked surprise. -Do I look that easy? Dear god, let it be no!-

"Why?", he responded, "I'm a good guy. I'll behave."

Ah! The "I'm a good guy" argument. Don't guys know that saying the you are a "good guy" implies you aren't?

"I'm sure you are, but I'd just prefer if we went to the movies instead.", I said.
"Alright"

We were looking for a movie online on his smartphone when he just came back on the subject.
"I'm sorry, but I just don't see what's the big deal, here.", he said, "Why don't you want to come to my place?"

I was floored -yet again!- Why was he making a big deal about me coming his place?

"I don't know you.", I said, figuring it was enough of an explanation for a complete stranger I'd met an hour ago.
"I'm not a pervert or anything!", he almost yelled.

There. That's when I realized why he really wanted me to go to his place; he wanted to murder me or cut out my liver to sell it on the black market.

"Look, I'm sure that you are, hum, a nice fella, but I'm actually not feeling very well. I should just head home.", I said, scared as s***.

I looked at me suspiciously.
"Alright", he finally said, "I could call you tomorrow to set up another date. Just give me your number."

I did something I never ever do. I fake-numbered him. I had too. I was scared that if I didn't; he would follow me home and try to cut me.

Oh, and, I never went back to that coffee shop. Better safe then sorry.

Sunday, January 27, 2013

The one with the high school crush.

This story isn't like any other I wrote on this website. This is the story of how I screwed up a date with a perfectly nice guy -yes, some are.- I meet this guy in High School when we were a bunch of fifteen y.o. with raging hormones. I was a sophomore and I was incredibly insecure about himself -like most teenage girls, duh!- This is not the story of a date that happened when I was in High School.This is the story of the date I had with this guy -let's call him Noah- three years of my graduation and how I screwed it up.

Noah, as a teenager, wasn't somebody that I should have been into. He had a bad reputation and lots of rumors were running around school about drug use and small robberies. He and his friends were the "bad seeds" of my High School. Before you start judging me for falling for a bad boy, you have to know that Noah wasn't like this when we met in sophomore year. He was a shy and artsy individual with a smart mouth. Frankly, we were in same group for almost every class and I didn't even know his name. I didn't noticed him until that  faithful day when I caught him staring at me in English class, a crooked smile on his face. After that, I realized that he was looking at me a lot. So, I started to pay attention to him and realized that there really was something about Noah -see what I did there!-

Anyway, I liked him although high school. When he didn't come to graduation, and then to prom, I started to forget about him. I was going off to college in the fall, I heard he wasn't. I had this job at the mall and I made new friends -and new crushes!- Plus, we were barely on speaking terms. We had chat very few times during our high school years. He had his friends; I had mine. That's how we rolled.Only with the people in our crew.

During almost two years, I lived my life and lived his. I dated guys and he dated girls. I don't remember thinking about him during that time. We reconnected via social medias. We e-mailed each other for a bit. It was so weird talking to him again. I was totally swoon by him. He had went back to the nice, sweet boy I once knew. I guessed it helped that high school ended and the pressure was off.

We met in a park. It was weird altogether. I don't remember ever feeling that uncomfortable around a boy. he wasn't any boy though. He was my high school crush -I know you understand me.- It was like my mind went blank. I couldn't form a proper sentence. I came out snobbish and icy when all I ever was, was insecure and scared. I even remember talking about how badly I thought of him and his friends back then. -I did that, really?- After that fiasco, I barely talked to him again. Truth was, I was so ashamed of the way I acted that I avoided any contact with him. There never was a second date.

Noah is now engaged. Yes, I screw that one up royally, but even though, it doesn't mean that things could have worked out between us anyway. I guess we'll never know. As you can all see, I'm not always the victim of bad dates. Sometimes, I'm the bad date others talk about with their friends.

The one with the fake Marty McFly.

What a boring Sunday! Almost made me wish a I a bad date scheduled. While, I was painting my toenails in bright pink, a particularly bad date came back to my mind. Argh. Just the thought of that guy makes me want to pull a Gandhi and become a celibate -forever-. Since I know you are all dying to know the story -yeah, right...-, I'll tell you!

Teddy was a waiter/musician/model/singer/everything else in the book. I met him at an 80's themed party -I know, I know...- He was dressed as Micheal J. Fox alias Marty McFly and I was the only girl who knew who Marty McFly was. It was a perfect match. We even made out when he walked me to my cab. I could tell he had smoke a couple of cigarettes, but I didn't mind. Maybe, because I was -a little- intoxicated. Anyway, after-make out, he asked for my number and said he was going to text me. -Texts...I hate texters with their; gtg, lmafo, lol (over-used of the lol), aamof, acgaf and shit.- I was flushed, so I said something like; 'kay.

The next day, he did text me. Asking if I wanted to grab drinks with him. Yeah, of course, I wrote back -in perfect English, lol!-

We met at this little pub. While the place was charming, Teddy definitely wasn't. He arrived on a big -and quite vulgar and flashy- motorcycle. I didn't immediately recognized him or neither did I wanted to, but when he called out my name, I had no choice anymore. He wasn't the dashing man I remembered. He was wearing a sleeveless white shirt and a pair of -really- baggy jeans. The kind teenagers wore back when I was in High School. Unfortunately, I wasn't looking to date a sixteen year old boy.

As he got closer, I couldn't help but noticed  that he went to the tanning salon or used some sort of spray tan thing. He had way too much gel in his hair. Yes, I was out with a Jershey Shore wannabe. Now, the Shore is a good mindless entertainment but I never wanted to bang Mike "The Situation". It's just not into my type of guy. Anyway, he sits down.

Immediately, I noticed that he was wearing two watches. Naively, I asked;
"So, hum, why the two watches?"
"It's just cool.", he said, looking as hurt as if I killed his bunny in the manner Alex did in Fatal Attraction.

After we ordered our drinks. He asked me what I thought of his bike. I simply answered that I didn't know much about them, nor did I think anything specific about the subject. He didn't seem pleased with my answer. He pretty much shut down after that, except to said;
"Just so you know; I won't pay for your drink."
"That's okay.", I responded, not caring since I wasn't into him at all.
"I just don't think that's something women should expect. They work, they can afford a seven dollar drink as much as I can.", he closed, looking pretty happy with himself.

Needless to say that I never saw him ever again. He did drunk dial me at three am once. I didn't pick up, of course. I supposed he needed some working girl to pay for his seven dollar drink or he was looking for a hook up. Argh, to think I kissed that jerk. I was able to forgive myself for that. After all, he did fool me into thinking that he was a Marty McFly when he was a DJ Pauly D meets 50 cent.

Saturday, January 26, 2013

The one with the cheap tricks.

I know that most of you I've been on a date -or even a relationship!- with a man -or a woman- who used, what I like to call, cheap tricks. By cheap tricks, I obviously mean, forgetting his wallet home or serving you leftovers. I thought I'd seen it all in the cheap tricks department, until I met Will. He was in construction. He was very manly -oh man!- and a tad redneck, but I figured that's be a nice change from the artsy guys I usually went for.

We met at a mutual friend's baseball game one summer. I agreed to meet him over a drink, the next week-end. The date went well and we agreed to have dinner together the following Saturday. He said I should pick the restaurant, and I remembered he said he loved seafood. So, I choose I nice place who served good seafood and wasn't that expensive.

We sat down, got drinks, had a nice conversation. After finishing our meals, Will suggested that we went to his place for one last drink. I was up for it; he was nice and somewhat funny. -Plus, he was good looking- Then, he also suggested that we split the the cost. I figured maybe money was tight for him these days, so I agreed.

When the waitress came back with one receipt, I divided the cost; about forty bucks each. I didn't have enough cash on me so I took my credit card out. He said he would pay his half cash. As the waitress got close, he leaned in and said;
"You know, I think it'll be less complicated if we pay with only one payment."

I thought that he was maybe embarrassed to not be able to pay for me.

"I could just give you my half in the car.", he said.

I agreed and handed over my credit card to the waitress.

In the car, Will started to look through his wallet, he seemed bothered.
"What's wrong?", I asked.

"I feel very embarrassed by this.", he said, "I don't have enough to pay you back for dinner."

Will looked like he was feeling very bad about the whole situation.

"It's okay.", I told him, "You can pay me back some other time."

There, I was sure I was going to see him again. We got along pretty great and I was attracted. He seemed to be too. After all, he did  propose we went back to his place.

We were driving and I thought that we were going back to his place for that drink he proposed earlier. However, he seemed to have something else in mind. -Don't worry, this story doesn't end by; he shopped me up in pieces and now, I'm a ghost looking for revenge.- He stopped the car in front of my building.
"I thought you wanted us to have one last drink at your place?", I said, confused.
"Yeah, I do. But, you know what, I'm beat. I feel like going to bed.", he explained, "I'll take you to dinner next week."

I was disappointed but I figured, alright he's tired. Big whop! He probably had a rough day at work.

I e-mailed him the next week after not hearing from him. He never called me back. I had been the victim of a cheap trick. The guy had free-mealed me. I couldn't believe I fell for his: "I feel very embarrassed" bullshit. If you are reading this, Will, I'm still waiting for that forty bucks, dude.

Basically, I got the tricks and no treats.

Friday, January 25, 2013

A Dating Monster's Manual: Dress To Impress (Male Edition).

I've done it for the ladies, I'm doing for the men. Of course, it's base on what I -and most of the females I know,btw.- like a man to wear on dates. Take it or leave it, guys.

Date #1: Drinks in a bar.
Outfit #1: Casual with a twist.
Don't go all trashy you guys. No t-shirt with a picture of Star Wars on it, no baggy pants and no army pants. It's the first date, make an effort -if you ever want to get laid-, please.

Idea #1: The button down.

A nice button down is a very good start. Add a nice pair of jeans -black or dark jeans are better and classy.- and sneakers, clean and in-good-shape sneakers, that is.

Idea #2: The cardigan.

Okay, not all men like to wear cardigans, but I'm telling you, they just look good. Nothing sexier than a guy wear a nice tee or button down with a cardigan on top. Hoodies aren't a good option for a first date. It makes the guy look sloppy.

Date #2: Movies.
Outfit #2: Geometry, sir!

Idea #1: The plaid shirt.

Plaid shirts are casual, yet dressed with a good pair of jeans and suede shoes, the outfit is cute and irresistible.

Idea #2: The stripes.

A sweater is a sure thing! Strips are a nice option. Layer it of you want with a button down, or wear a jacket over it.

Date #3: The outdoor dates.
Outfit #3: Lots of layers.

Idea #1: The blazer.

Take a tweed blazer, wear a hoodie and a printed shirt under it to make it more casual. Also, you'll look like you have a fierce fashion sense.

Idea #2: The accessorizer.

Men, time to accessorize. Printed scarfs, hats, vests. Just do it with taste and remember, less is more.

Date #4: The concert/show.
Outfit #4: Hit them up with style.

Idea #1: The graphic tee.

 Look like you know your stuff and wear the band's color. Or, wear one of your favorite band's shirt. It could give you something to talk about.

Idea #2: The leather.

It just look cool when a guy is wear a leather jacket to a concert. You'll look like a chill, yet cool guy. Plus, it's quite sexy and stylish.

Date #5: The fancy date.
Outfit #5: Go all out, boys.

Idea #1: The suit.

Never underestimate the effect a good old suit on a woman! We love it! Really, we do. So, suit up, guys!

Idea #2: The pop of color.

A fun color tie -purple, pink and red, are my personal favorites.- on a black or white button down just looks really really good.

Thursday, January 24, 2013

A Dating Monster's Manual: Dress To Impress (Ladies Edition).

First impressions count more than you might think. It's everything. Over my tumultuous dates, I gathered some tips about dating outfits. Here's some of my suggestions. You can follow them, or not, but beware if you don't.

Date #1: Drinks in a bar.
Outfit #1: Casual with a twist.
So, the guy asks you to meet him for drinks. The key here is to not overdress. Girls -well most girls- want to look nice on a first date and tend to take their look too far. Natural make up  is always better than big bright colors. If its dark outside/inside, you can put a little more, but still, keep it natural.

Idea #1: The dress.
 
The dress is nice, but not too dressy. She accessorized just enough, some cute belt and bracelets. A winning look for sure. Plus, it shows a little leg.

Idea #2: The skinny.

The combination of a dressy blouse and a pair of nice skinny jeans is awesome for a first date! Comfortable and cute.

Date #2: Movies.
Outfit #2: Jeans-o-rama.
Going to the movies is a fun date idea. What you have to remember is that, yes, it's casual but still you can dress-up that jeans and t-shirt combo, ladies!

Idea #1: The heels and Jeans.

Pairing heels with jeans is always a sexy choice. You can even wear a destroyed jeans and make it softer and sexier with a lacy shirt.

Idea #2: The pop of color.

Catch his eye with a nice pair of colored jeans. It makes the outfit a little more special than the regular blue jeans. Wear it with a simple tank-top and a jacket/blazer and you are all set for a movie.

Date #3: The outdoor dates.
Outfit #3: Jackets and boots, baby.
Going for a walk, a picnic, a barbecue. Here's what you need to be thinking of when you want to look nice, yet, comfortable and memorable.

Idea #1: The bomber jacket.
 
Waited jacket are the best for an outdoor date. You can do layers, and they make a women look good. Paired it with cute ankle boots and you've got a winning outfit. Plus the neutral colors in the fall is a nice pick. In the spring, you can try more fun colors like yellow and pink.

Idea #2: The accessorizer.


Trying new things, having fun with accessories, outdoors are the best accessories generator. Fun-colored scarfs, hats, or -like in the picture- fur (fake, of course.) Don't over do it though. Do it with taste. Less is more.

Date #4: The concert/show.
Outfit #4: Cool chick.
A little music, a little singing, a little dancing, it's could end up being a nice date. When you are going to a show or a concert, it's the ideal occasion to show your sense of style to your guy! What you want to do is appear as a cool chick, and here's how!

Idea #1: The mini.

In this case, you can rock a mini-skirt. Plaid, for a rock or alternative concert is the perfect look. It's cool, hip and quite sexy. Don't trash the look by wearing knee socks or see-through blouse. Keep it classy; a nice shirt and a jeans or bomber jacket.

Idea #2: The graphic tee.

Look like you know your stuff, wear the band's colors! Or, if you can't get your hands on any of their stuff, show him which bands you prefer by wearing a graphic tee! Pair it with nice jeans. No destroyed jeans, it'll make the look trashy. A cute skirt could also soften the look.

Date #5: The fancy date.
Outfit #5: Little black dress.
Your guy is insisting in taking you to a fancy restaurant, or to the ballet  maybe even to the opera -what you never know?!- Impress him with a classic look and the good accessories.

Idea #1: The chiffon dress.

To think that chiffon dresses doesn't flatter a women's silhouette is wrong. The empire waistline hide little imperfections that we hope they doesn't discover because monogamy -oups! I dared.-

Idea #2: The black and white combo.

The black and white dress is what I like to call; a sure thing. It's always in and chic. You'll get it right every single time with this duo. Pair it with neutral colors and you'll be good to go.

Stay tuned for the male edition.



The one with the porn star.

Now, you maybe think that you've been on bad dates. That you are a true dating disaster because you've been out with a guy twice your age, or a total creep who looked you up to the internet. Let me tell you something; you've seen nothing yet.

College is fun, right? You meet a tons of new people. Some are interesting, some aren't. I thought Brandon was a nice fella, a pal. He sat next to me in English class. He had a quirky sense of humor -that'll get me everytime!- and was smart. He talked passionately about Camus, or Balzac. He liked literature, cinema, arts, and apparently, me. I  was floored when he asked me to coffee after class. I was all excited, couldn't think about anything else all day.

We sat down with our coffees. Face to face, we seemed to have nothing to say to each other. I was quite disappointing. He was always making some insightful remarks in class. I desperately tried to spark up a conversation. I asked him about his hometown, his family and his hobbies. He seemed to come out of his shell and warmed up. As he got -and I got- more and more comfortable, the subject came on jobs. Part-time jobs since we were students. I was telling him all about my misery as cashier. I was telling him about the time a customer tried to grope me when he said;
"Just a normal day at work for me!", he said, laughing. Obviously, I thought he was joking so I played along.   
"Oh yeah? The girls can't get their hands off of you, uh?", I responded, playfully.

[I was thinking. I like that guy a lot. Maybe, its could really turn into something. Like a relationship.]

"Well, that's kind of their job not to.", he told me, a little spark in his eyes.
"Payed to mess around with you, kind of an ideal job!", I joked.

[Up until there, I was having the time of my life.]

"Yeah, well, you might think that but, it's not as ideal as it seems.", he said, dead serious.
"So, where do you work anyway?", I asked.
"In a studio.", he simply answered.
"That seems interesting.", I said, enthusiastic, "What do you do in the studio?"
"Well, I'm, uh, acting."
"Acting? Like an extra?", I asked, unaware of what was coming at me.
"No, no. I'm an actor in movies."

[So, I was dating a celebrity and I didn't knew it! Wow!]

"What movies have you been in? Maybe, I heard of them?", I asked.
"Hum, well, the last one I did was Naughty School Girl 2.", he declared.
"That, hum, that sounds like a porno movie title...", I said, scared as hell of his response.
"Because, it is. That's kind of my job."

[I felt like the world was crashing down on me.]

"So, you are a porn star?"
"Yeah. Does it bother you?", he asked.

[I could have go with honesty and run out of there, screaming, but instead it is what I did...]

"Nop. Doesn't matter to me!"

After I finished my coffee, I told me I had homework to do and left, shocked. The next week, he passed my a note in class asking me to dinner. I politely declined, stating that I wasn't really in a "dating" mood right now. I'm sure he knew it was because of the porno situation, but we both avoided the subject. For now on, I refereed to this date as the time I dated a porn star.

Wednesday, January 23, 2013

The one with the blind date.

I'm the kind of person who believes that meeting someone new is never a waste of time. Until, I was set on a blind date with Matthew. He was the friend of my hairdresser. Very time I had an appointment with her, she kept asking me if I was single because she had "someone perfect for me". A couple of weeks ago, I finally caved in. I agreed to meet Matthew who I heard was a good guy with a bright future ahead. Too good to be true? Hell, yeah!

Matthew choose the restaurant -yes, he insisted on buying me dinner-. We agreed to meet there. The restaurant was nice, very fancy. I was under-dressed and feeling incredibly uncomfortable while the waiter was taking me to Matthew's table. Wearing a suit my grand-uncle would have picked out, bald and cross-eyed, there was Matthew waiting for me. I thought about running away and never looking back, but I didn't. As he shook my hand, the only thing I could think about was; I'm being set up with a grandpa -and his palm is f*** sweaty!-

Plus, he is checking me out outrageously. I want to disappear under the table. Yes, he is nice to talk with and quite smart, but I could never picture myself kissing him -just writing it was hard enough!-

He payed for everything even though I offered to pay my half. -knowing I wasn't going to see him again, I wanted to be fair-

After I was done stuffing my face as fast as I could with my dish, Matthew asked me;
"Do you want a desert?"
"No, thanks. I, uh, have to get going soon. I have to be at school early tomorrow.", I said, as polity as I could.
"Well, how about one last drink?", he asked, his eyes full of hopes. I felt like a jerk leaving in a hurry after eating my dinner, so I said;
"Alright. One drink."

One scotch neat and one glass of red wine later, we headed to the parking lot.
"So, coffee at my place?", he asked.
"No, thanks.", I responded, walking to my car.

We left it there. He left me a couple of messages on my answering machine the next week. I finally called him back to tell him that I wasn't interested in going out with him again, but that we could be friends. He got mad.
"That's just rude!", he said.
"Rude? How am I rude?", I asked, my jaw on the floor.
"You just used me for a free dinner!"
"I didn't! I even offered to pay for myself!", I yelled back.
"All the girls say that, but none of them mean it! You had no intention of paying!"

Then, he demanded to know why he wasn't good enough for me. I was floored.
"You are just not my type. What more can I say?", I said.
"Well, why did you order another drink if you weren't feeling it?"
"I agreed to another drink, so it clearly meant that I wanted to sleep with you! It's none-sense!", I responded.
"It's none-sense to you because you didn't pay. If you had, you would see what I'm talking about!", he yelled.
"If you wanted to pay and get sex for sure, you should have gotten a hooker!" -That's what I thought I should have said, thinking back about it. Instead, I just hung up the phone and block his number.

And yes, I changed hairdresser. Sadly.

The one with the premarital sex.

Hi, I'm Emily and six months ago, I had a date that terrified me to my very soul. Now, let's be honest here, I'm not usually going on dates with men I meet on the internet. Six months ago, I didn't even have a profile on an online dating website. Then, there was this drunken lonely Friday night. The kind of night where you feel sorry for yourself because all of your girlfriends choose to snuggle at home with their husband/boyfriend/lesbian lover instead of going out with you. So, you have a glass of wine -or six- and you hit the internet. Bam! Five minutes later you have a brand new profile on a dating website and you are flirting with strangers. I wasn't even thinking about I'd find anybody that I would actually like -and not just somebody I convinced myself I liked because I'm lonely-. Nevertheless, I receive an interesting e-mail from an handsome stranger. We talk -well chat!- all night. He is funny, charming and interesting. Jackpot! I thought, foolishly. A couple of days -and e-mails- later, he suggests a rendez-vous. I'm up for it. Can't be worst than spending another night alone. Turns out, yeah, It can.

Red wine, at the bar, waiting. Enters Andy*. It started out well. Then, the date seemed to turned into an interview.
"Do you smoke?", he asked.
"No, not at all.", I said, batting my eyes.
"Good. I don't like smokers.", he responded.

[At this point, I'm thinking; great,I don't like dating smokers too!]

I order another glass of wine. He orders another soda.
"Do you drink a lot?", he asked, looking at my wine suspiciously.
"No, no.", I said surprised, "I'm a social drinker. You don't drink?"
"No. Never.", he responded, all casual, "Never even had a sip."
"Really?", I said.
"Yeah. Never drank alcohol, or smoked a cigarette, or did any kind of drugs.", he said, "I have very strong values." 

[Okay, so he has values and believes in them. Good for him.]

"Did you ever do drugs?", he asked.
"Uh, no.", I said.
"You didn't even smoked weed?", he lashed at me.
"No. I didn't."

[I felt like I was a teenager coming home to her parents from a party and smelling weird.]

"Ever?", he asked, again.
"No. Never, ever."

[I was starting to be a little irritated here. Especially since he looked like he didn't believe me at all.]

"So, you said you were a student, uh?",I said, trying to re-direct the conversation.
"Yes."
"What do you study?", I asked.
"Theology."

[His profile did say that he was a christian. I didn't see the big deal.]

After telling me how much he loved his mother and intended on living at home until he got married, he asked me the thousand dollar question;

"So, do you practice premarital sex?", he said, looking me straight into the eyes.
"Uh, uh. Well, yes.", I answered, before pouring the rest of my wine down my throat and hoping that it was enough to get me drunk. Really drunk.
"Hum.", he said, "That's okay. I don't judge. I just -well-, won't tell my mother!", he said, laughing.
"Well, what's there to judge?", I -foolishly- said.
"I take sexual intercourse really seriously. I don't intend on having any before my wedding night."

[Yes, I was on a date with a 27 y.o virgin.]

Then, he insisted on talking about how many kids I wanted and if I was welling to move to the country. When I said I wasn't sure I wanted kids or if I wanted to live in the country someday, he started looking at his watch a lot. Pretty soon, I was walking home alone. All I could think about was; why did he tell me any of his stuff before going on a date with me! Clearly, he was looking for a very specific kind of girl, and could have given my a head's up.

[The guy even had the nerve to e-mail me a brochure titled; Start a new life, become a christian today!, or something.]

*I changed the name of my dates to preserve the identities of the poor men who agreed to go on a date with me!